"I know, okay!" - that's what I'm used to saying to my dad whenever he tries to share some of his fatherly knowledge with me. Ever since I was young, I've had this strange way of talking back to my father that most kids would never dare to do.
After being back in Taiwan for over a month now, and living under my dad's roof, I've had to check myself a couple of times before I lashed out at him for trying to teach me something I already knew. In fact, if I was anyone else watching myself behave this way, I'd likely slap the shit out of me already.
I had a great discussion with my stepmother tonight (we bond over several drinks at dinner) and she and I talked about this very issue. She's always found it hard to address this with me, mostly because she never felt it was her place to do so. However, it's great to get your ass kicked once in a while when you really deserve it.
My dad and I have always had a strained relationship. After my parents divorced, he was villainized by my mom's family, he ultimately left Canada because he had no income left to support himself, let alone my brother and I, and we had a stint where we didn't talk for two years between when I was 15 - 17 years old. We only reunited after he learned about my mom's passing (he found out two years after she passed) and it's been a long road to trying to patch up our understanding of one another.
That should not be an excuse for my poor behaviour. What's been great about this time off and being able to interact with him everyday is that we're literally reclaiming the time we missed out on when I was a child. He's in a way trying to parent without over parenting, I'm trying to be a son without acting too much like a child.
When I told my father of my decision to quit work and leave Toronto for a bit, he didn't hesitate to support my decision or to offer up the fact that he would like me to go to Tibet with him. For all his overbearing qualities, he is one of the kindest people I know, and I have much to learn from him about how to care for others.
What I'm more grateful for is that I have a chance to still work on our relationship, spend three weeks with him in Tibet with nothing but the scenery and good conversation to fill our time, and hopefully years left for us to make up for the time that has been lost due to silly actions in the past.
Countdown to Tibet - 11 days.
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